Girls Weekend – Summer ‘11 - The Final Day

On Sunday, our last full day in Colorado, it was unanimous that we would head to a water park.  Water slides, inner tubes, the works.  It was going to be a super hot day, so it was going to be the perfect thing to do. And it was. 

The minute we arrived I knew it was going to be great for Emma.  She loves the water.  It was crowded, but it wasn’t NYC crowded, so we were able to find a nice spot with a couple of lounge chairs as our base. For some reason I was starving, and so was Emma, so as we were spraying on our sunscreen, we were also inhaling some left over pizza. As soon as Lola was sunscreened, she was off like a shot.  Emma took off after her.  I grabbed my sunglasses and followed them with my eyes for a while, until it seemed as if they were fine together.  Then Leslie and I looked at eachother and we followed them to the slides.

They were having a blast.  The slides reminded me of The Giant Slide in Mayfield Heights, Ohio where we used to go as kids.  Except this one was in water.  Sebastian would have loved this.

Emma spotted me and we went on another bigger, curvy slide together.  It was really fun, and we went on with our day trying out the different slides and running into Lola, Leslie, Jones and Michael along the way.  Everyone seemed content to do his or her own thing, and that was fine by me.  We took some food and slushy breaks, but mostly we were all in the water, except for Christina and Michael’s friend Shawn, who didn’t have kids to look after and could actually sit and bake in the sun like adults. 

During one of our breaks, my phone rang and it was Sebastian.  “Hi Honey!” I answered. No response.  The reception was really bad, so I had to walk to a spot to get a better signal.  He called me again and after a few tries I heard “Hi Mama.” The reception was still pretty bad, but at least I could hear him.  I love the sound of his voice. And that he still calls me Mama at thirteen. 

“How is your weekend with Daddy?” I asked.

“Good.” he is a man of few words.

“Well, we are at a water park today, as you can probably hear.”

“Yeah. I can hear.”

“I can’t wait to see you tomorrow.”

“Me too.”

“I love you.”

“Love you, too.”

About an hour later, we decided to go and eat at the famous Cherry Cricket, which is known to have the best burgers in Denver. It was a beautiful drive into the city and soon we got to this dive bar playing 80’s and early 90’s hits.  Ah, The Cherry Cricket Bar.  Another perfect choice.  The three kids headed straight to the pin ball games, and we got settled in with the menus.  We were all pretty hungry now and ready for some food.  And beer.  Leslie recommended my beer, “Mama’s Little Yellow Pils.” Excellent.  We had these jalepeno poppers with homemade jelly, which were curiously good, and my burger was amazing.  And that was not just the pils talking…

I looked over at Emma, and she had devoured her burger and was asking for some of mine.  Another win.   

After dinner we went outside and took some pictures of the kids as the boys went to get the cars.  All three kids were in perfect synch and there were lots of giggles.  Back at home our plan was to watch a movie and get the kids down early.  The movie of choice was “Never say Never” The Justin Bieber Movie.  I will admit, I was almost as anxious as Emma was to see it.  Leslie, Christina and I watched the entire movie with the kids, while Michael and Shawn found a nice quiet spot in the bedroom to watch the baseball game. 

That night I was hoping to get Emma to sleep right after the movie along with Lola and Jones, and head back into the living room for some grown up time before we left the next morning.  

As I went into the bathroom to brush my teeth, in comes Emma.  “Why aren’t you in bed?” I said with slight irritation.

“I’m scared.”

“Well, you need to give me some privacy, please. I’ll be right out to tuck you in.”

She didn’t budge. 

I finished brushing my teeth, washed my face and even flossed just to make my point, and then I got her back into bed.  I read her a chapter of Emily’s Runaway Imagination, scratched her back and said “Ok, I will just be a little while and then I will come right back.”

“No! I’m going with you!” she said.

“No you are not.  This is grown up time now.”

She started to get out of bed and follow me, so back down I went. 

I scratched her back some more and put my arm around her to wait until she fell asleep. 

The next thing I knew the sun was shining and I realized it was our day to leave.

I was sad to leave, but I was OK to head back to Brooklyn, too.  I missed Sebastian and Dave and quite honestly, I was ready for Emma to have some Daddy time.  Leslie drove us to the airport and I teared up saying goodbye.  I have known her forever, after all.  Emma was sad to leave, too.  She even gave Leslie a hug and mumbled a thank you. 

It was a great girls weekend. 

Three Little Birds – How Nature Brings Us Back to Life

This past week my kids and I spent a glorious stress free vacation in sunny North Carolina visiting my sister and her family.  It was stress free, but it wasn’t by any means electronic free.  I really tried to unplug us, but given the options (macbook, tv, iphone, itouch, ipad2, wii), it wasn’t easy.  Both of my kids as well as my sister’s kids are growing up with electronics in their every day life.  We have time restrictions, but it’s a struggle for me to enforce them, especially in the summer.   In some ways it amazes me how advanced and adept in anything electronic they are.   My sister’s kids are younger than mine, but at two and four years old, they are still both able to navigate their Daddy’s iphone with no problems whatsoever. 

“Sebastian, how come I can’t get my phone to stop flipping the screen around when I turn it sideways?” In two seconds he comes over and taps the screen a few times and it’s fixed.  “There you go, Mama.” He says with a twinge of annoyance.  He's 13.  

In some ways, I am saddened by the fact that they have so much time with electronic stuff and so little time with nature.  When we were kids, my sister and I had each other to play with, our friends on the street, and the backyard.  We were free to roam and explore.  We would open up the backdoor on a summer’s day, and only come in when we were hungry.  My sister especially was one with nature.  She was constantly fostering animals and could build things with her bare hands from any materials that she found lying around in Dad’s garage.  We were also pretty amazing tree climbers, and would hang out in the branches for hours.  We were pretty content with this, and didn’t have much choice about it either.  Our kids today have so many choices and distractions away from this lifestyle, that to call it sensory overload would be an understatement.  

One day, while sitting on the back porch of my sister’s house, we noticed her dog Jada going crazy jumping up and down by this tree next to us.  After many attempts to get her to stop, we realized that she was barking at a nest of 3 blue robin eggs.  We called all four of the kids over to come and have a look, and from that minute on, we were hooked.  Every morning we checked on the nest.  We watched the eggs hatch into birds and watched the little birds grow every day.  My sister and I saw both the female and the male bird feeding the babies.  (We had no idea they both did this?) One night there was a huge storm and as Emma and I lay in our bed listening to it, she asked me about the baby birds.  Were they going to be ok? I told her that the Mama bird was used to these storms and would sit on her babies and protect them until the storm was over.  The next day (much to my relief), the baby birds were still there safe and sound.  They had grown so much in just a day that they were almost bursting out of their nest.   

On our last day I went out to check on the birds early in the morning and took a photo to send to Dave back in NY.  I think it was so that I could also remember how amazing it was. 

On our flight home I showed the picture to the kids (on my iphone) and they were both so happy.  I found myself reveling in the fact that all of us were so connected to these little birds, and that our kids were fascinated with them.  It made me feel more alive.  Possibly this is how the kids felt, too?  Emma kept saying how she just wanted to hold them and feel how fluffy they were.  

  

I think maybe we will have to check out more hands on things this summer, and maybe she could even hold some baby chicks somewhere? You can’t really get that same feeling from an app on the ipad. 

To Be Only Who You Are

A couple of weeks ago, continuing on my quest of Super Momdom, I decided to do something positive for myself to gear up for a busy fall of Momhood and this Fall Tour that I am starting.   I treated myself to a weekend-long meditation.  I left the kids in the capable hands of their Dads, and headed into my journey.  I'll admit, I was nervous.  Having some time to myself is a luxury, but also having too much time to think can be a bit scary.  I found myself immersed in thoughts of self doubt and frustration, only to release and discover that my life was going just the way it was supposed to go, and all was well.  I mean, who is in charge of my life anyway? Me.  And in all of my efforts to be the ultimate Super Mom, the best way for me to raise my kids in a positive way AND to have a successful marriage and career is to be only who I am. Only who I am.  
It is not easy for me.  It takes a lot of work and a lot of patience with myself to be able to be this open about life, but it is really the only way.  And I believe.
I recently saw the interview between Oprah and J.K. Rowling (the creator and author of The Harry Potter Series) and I must say that I was riveted.  Joe (J.K) was so articulate and honest about her journey and it was really great for me to hear her story.  She struggled first with depression as a single Mom and then struggled with many obstacles to get her first Harry Potter book published with the right people (the ones who believed as she did that her story could change the world).  And it worked.  She believed.  Her persistence and commitment to be herself was so strong that she sold over 400 million books in 200 countries around the world.  At the end of her interview, Oprah asked her "what does she know for sure?"  Joe thought about it and said she knows that "love is THE most powerful thing of all." And then Oprah asked her "what was her dream of happiness?"  She said according to the first Harry Potter, Dumbledore says "The happiest man alive would look in the mirror and see himself exactly as he is." And then she said "So I would have to say that I'm pretty close."

Couple Time

One of the benefits of doing what I do is being able to have great experiences like the one I had last weekend in DC.

This weekend was planned way in advance, with Dave and I deciding that we would do this last part of the spring tour ourselves – without the kids. (Sort of funny for someone who does kids shows, but hey... we all need a break from parenthood sometimes).


The week leading up to it was long and we were tired, and even though we were tempted to throw the kids in the car at the last minute, we stuck to our plan and left them with Albert and Jen on Saturday morning. After one small frustrating detour around Brooklyn before getting on the right highway, we actually started to relax into the trip. As per our usual, we starting talking about the kids, but then slowly we started talking about our goals and what we really wanted to do with our lives. We are both trying to pursue careers that we believe in, and it's not always that easy for either of us to keep doing this. The best part is that both of us still truly believe in each other. Our lives are always on "over dive," and so sometimes we forget.


We arrived at our hotel in DC, promptly switched rooms to one with a working AC, and got ready to go out. Our evening was spent window shopping in fancy furniture stores, dining in a lovely Spanish fusion restaurant, and simply enjoying some quality couple time.


Our show the next day was held at the historic Sixth and I Synagogue for a family music series that they’re just beginning to develop. We were greeted by Meredith the curator of the event, who provided us with donuts, bagels and water bottles (such a bonus). Steve arrived a few minutes later, and soon it was time to play. I was opening for Alex and The Kaleidoscope Band, who’s music I was only vaguely familiar with, so I was curious to hear them play live. They were wonderful! Super-great beat and a nice eclectic sound. I had asked them to join us for our last two songs, “Goin on a Road Trip" and "The Lion Sleeps Tonight," and it was really fun for me and Steve to rock out with them.


As I was scanning the crowd, I noticed a bunch of familiar faces and an entire row of kids wearing my Suzimusic t-shirts! They were dancing and having a great time. What a wonderful feeling that never, ever gets old to me.


I also saw Dave smiling at me, taking pictures and talking with some people in the audience. I was so happy he was there with me. After the show, I was able to spend time with my little fans giving out stickers and hugs, while Dave packed up my gear for me.


Heading back to Brooklyn after the show, we were anxious to get back to the kids, but also we felt way more connected and ready to keep supporting each other on this journey we are taking. After all, that is what it's all about.